One time back in my working-at-Target days (years ago), I was working in electronics and some dude comes and asks for help in the stereos section. So I was helping this dude and he looks around and starts talking all quiet, and this is the conversation that ensued: "
Customer Dude: Hey man, I’m new to town, can you tell me where I can find some bud?
Brennan: Naw dude, sorry I can’t help you on that one.
CD: Come on man you can tell me.
B: No for reals man, I wouldn’t know.
CD: Come on man, I know you can tell me where to find some bud.
B: Naw man I’m not into that stuff.
CD: I don’t believe you.
B: For reals man.
CD: For reals?
B: For reals.
CD: For reals?
B: I’m not playing.
CD: Oh wow, I never would have known by looking at you.
The weird thing is those were definitely not the only times some one has assumed that I do drugs. Most people hate to hear about it because they say the solution is easy and that I could just cut my hair. I call that giving in. I say however that it is dumb to assume stuff by looking at people. My brother Jacob has already stopped reading at this point so I will say it, but Jesus had long hair and he was perfect.
The great Mitch Hedberg (RIP we miss you man) once said:
"People associate long hair with drug use. I wish people associated long hair with something other than drug use, like an extreme longing for cake. And then strangers would see a long haired guy and say, "That guy eats cake!" "He is on bundt cake!" Mothers saying to their daughters, "Don’t bring the cake eater over here anymore. He smells like flour. Did you see how excited he got when he found out your birthday was fast approaching?"
So the moral of the story is, is… I’m not sure. Mitch Hedberg is a funny dude I guess. And I miss him. And hair length or outward appearance means little to nothing about anyone. My opinion of my parents actually went up when I found the photo of the two of them with their matching afros.
Brennan's Weekly Band Blog
Band of the Week: The Bridges
Musical Style: Rock, like the kind you’d expect to hear from four chicks and a dude from Alabama, only even awesomer than you’d expect.
Where They’re From: I guess I already answered that one.
Why They Are Cool: I love The Bridges.
Fact: Four of the Five band mebers are siblings and the remaining is a cousin.
Brennan’s Favorite The Bridges song: All The Words.
Check The Bridges out at: http://www.myspace.com/thebridges
5 comments:
I never said to cut your hair. Don't you dare say I said that! What I said was more along the lines of: "That's how it goes, please stop complaining to me about how you are stereotyped and discriminated against and telling me how Jesus had long hair for the MILLIONTH time."
It's not right, but haters will hate regardless. Don't make it worse by alienating your family and friends with incessant whining.
Good post, I love Mitch (RIP).
I never said you said to cut, I was not refering to you, Jacob. I just thought you would stop reading by the time you saw mention of the name Jesus for the same reason you said.
Ok cool. I wasn't mad, I just wanted to clear my name, you know? Everyone knows people who tell other people to cut their hair suck, and I am not one of those people.
PS - My favorite part of that Mitch quote is "Don’t bring the cake eater over here anymore. He smelled like flour."
dude, i applaud you for your most excellent hair. jesus, moses, and john the revelator all arguably had the longest hair ever, and mitch hedburg is the man. all of them are role models i think. some more than others, lol.
i have totally experienced the people-want-to-sell-you-drugs-because-your-hair-is-long thing too, back in the day. now i am growing my hair out again and i am not planning on stopping for 1 year. that's my resolution 2009.
here's the solution for you though, man: Move to Hawaii. Serious. No one even questions my questionable fro here. Even at church. In fact, people ask me all the time if I surf. Or how's the surf. Or whether I surf longboard or shortboard. No one even thinks about axing me the drug question. serious.
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